Alone on bed

When I large my hands to take my beloved in arms, i found nothing on bed, except the pillows. I woke up to see my wife (and time), my wife was not on bed and watch was in mood of SAD face of the time i.e.  4:35AM. It's surprised for me to see I was alone on bed ...(yeah.. actually married men have to prepare their mind, if they want to sleep alone on your big size double bed). It was too early for my wife to get up and do morning chores, so i thought she must have gone to restroom and may come back soon. So i waited there and watching a fan and white ceiling of bedroom. After a few minute of time when she didn't back to room, i thought and went to check my self, but i couldn't see her anywhere in house. I check the main door of house which was locked properly. I was loosing my penitence and was so tensed to drop myself down on ground.
I was not sure how I was alone?? to be very frank ...mostly I enjoyed my bed when my wife stay with her mother for couple of days... (every married men love this era of freedom). But today it was different, I was worried more and looking for her, trying to remember the last night stories which may give me hint why i was alone. I try to recollect the things and situation in our bedroom.. (don't give me that look ...yeah... some time you need to recollect the things around you even when you are in your own bedroom) but nothing is giving me a hint about the last night or why i was alone on bed. I really wanted to know where is my wife and why i was alone on bed.
I was full of question asking myself and answering them to me only. Why and where she might have gone? how can she go without telling me and so on.... the stream of question is more than answers and I was not sure how many time I repeated same questions to me. When i back to bedroom, i was astonished to see her on the floor of other side of our bed, which is not in sight when I was on bed or while move out of the room.
hooooshhhhh ... is only reveling sound out from my mouth at that time. Then I recollect the things which she told me last night, that she is having fast for nine days/night for 'navaratri' and she would sleep on floor as religious process. Till that time my mind was just thinking rationalize way.
This morning pill of the day was enough for me to keep me awake for till she wake up and help me to think how we think in fraction of second and what we do when we're unable to get what we expected in life, even when we are in deep sleep. I was really in deep sleep in the morning when i stretched my arm to find my wife beside me.
It is the same way of feeling, when we are in deep sleep and when we are in our normal life, trying to doing something for our carrier. We don't wanted to go away from the things which we like/love and when we are out of reach of the things we just can't control our emotions. We feel very annoyed when things are out of our reach. Our brain/mind is really source of every thought and we think too much in all situations no matter what's the situation is. Most of the time our thoughts are negative. We expect the positive from every worst situation of life but we think most negative in that time only :) how funny it is.
I couldn't sleep after that hiccup morning of today. Morning pill was very tiny but hard and very effective to keep me awake till i come to office.

Ayodhya is going to Supreme court ...

From last 60 years we are just debating/fighting and making issue of 'Ayodhya' and still unsure about many questions..Do we really need to know what/when/how and how long something was there and now what is there? will these questions get solved and can we able to see the FINAL words on Ayodhya?


Recently I heard a nice poem from Prasoon Joshi on Ayodhya and it gives a pinch to my heart.

kisi ne kuch banaya tha, kisi ne kuch banaya hain..
kisi ne kuch banaya tha, kisi ne kuch banaya hain..

Kahi mandir ki parchayee, kahi masjid ka saya hain..
Na tab pucha tha hamase, na ab puchane aaye hain..
Hamesha faisale karake hame yuhi sunaya hain..

kisi ne kuch banaya tha, kisi ne kuch banaya hain..

hame fursat kaha? roti ke golayee ke chakkar se...
Na ja ne kiska mandir hain, na janae kiski masjid hain..
Na ja ne kon ulzhata hain sidhe sache dhangaon ko...

Na ja ne kon ulzhata hain sidhe sache dhangaon ko...
Na ja ne ye kiski sajish hain, na ja ne kiski ye jid hain...
Ajab sa silsila hain, na jane kisane chalaya hain....

kisi ne kuch banaya tha, kisi ne kuch banaya hain..

Who kahate hain tumhara hain, jara tum ek najar dalo..
Who kahate hain badho mango zaroori hain, na tum talo..
Who kahate hain badho mango zaroori hain, na tum talo..

magar apani jarurat to hain bilkul hi alag isase..
jara thahrao jara socho hame sachonme mat dalo...
batayo kon ye shola mere angan main laya hain...

kisi ne kuch banaya tha, kisi ne kuch banaya hain..

Agar hindu main andhi hain, agar tufa musalma hain..
to aayo andhi tufan yaar banake kuch naya kare...
to aayo andhi tufan yaar banake kuch naya kare...

to aayo ek nazar dale aaham se kuch sawalon par...
Kayi kone andhere hain, mashaloan ko diya karate hain..
Kayi kone andhere hain, mashaloan ko diya karate hain..

Ab asali dard bolenge jo sine main chupaya hain..

kisi ne kuch banaya tha, kisi ne kuch banaya hain..

किसी ने कुछ बनाया था, किसी ने कुछ बनाया हैं..
किसी ने कुछ बनाया था, किसी ने कुछ बनाया हैं..

कही मंदिर की परछाई हैं, कही मस्जिद का साया हैं..
ना तब पुछा था हमसे, ना अब पुछने आये हैं..
हमेशा फैसले करके, हमें युही सुनाया हैं..


किसी ने कुछ बनाया था, किसी ने कुछ बनाया हैं..


हमें फुर्सत कहा, रोटी के गोलाई के चक्कर से..
ना जाने किसका मंदिर हैं, ना जाने किस की मस्जिद हैं..


ना जाने कोण उलझा था हैं, सीधे सच्चे धन्गोँ को..


ना जाने कोण उलझा था हैं, सीधे सच्चे धन्गोँ को..
ना जाने किसकी साजिश हैं, ना जाने किसकी ये जिद हैं..
अजब सा सिलसिला हैं, ना जाने किसने चलाया हैं..

किसी ने कुछ बनाया था, किसी ने कुछ बनाया हैं..

वो कहते हैं तुम्हारा हैं, जरा तुम एक नजर डालो..
वो कहते हैं बढ़ो मांगो ज़रूरी हैं, ना तुम टालो..
वो कहते हैं बढ़ो मांगो ज़रूरी हैं, ना तुम टालो..

मगर अपनी जरुरत तो हैं बुल्कुल ही अलग इससे..
जरा ठहरो जरा सोचो, हमें सचोंमें मत डालो..
बतावो कोण ये शोला मेरे आंगन मैं लाया हैं..


किसी ने कुछ बनाया था, किसी ने कुछ बनाया हैं..

अगर हिन्दू मैं अंधी हैं, अगर तुफा मुसल्मा हैं..
तो आओ अंधी तूफान साथ मिलके कुछ नया करे..
तो आओ अंधी तूफान साथ मिलके कुछ नया करे..

तो आओ एक नजर डाले अहम् से कुछ सवालों पर..
कई कोने अँधेरे हैं, मशालों को दिया करते हैं..
कई कोने अँधेरे हैं, मशालों को दिया करते हैं..

अब असली दर्द बोलेंगे जो सीनों मैं छुपाया हैं..

किसी ने कुछ बनाया था, किसी ने कुछ बनाया हैं..

Do we really bother about the verdict of Ayodhya?